Tired

More than studying, tedious lectures and spending 12 agonizing hours at boring hospital clinicals, my kids have a tendency to really really frustrate me and wear me out over the weekend. It's a lot of time to spend together. Our apartment is a nice size but still not big enough for four active kids. And somehow there are always toys and clothes and food everywhere. Then I clean up and a little while later the scenario repeats itself. I know I am not unique in this but it is tiring and draining. And to ask my kids a hundred times not to eat outside of the kitchen or dining room table and still find food and crumbs everywhere.
And to have my two year old cling to me and refuse to go to sleep unless I sit next to him or he has his head in my lap or his feet on my arms or is in some way still connected to me. To have him insist on accompanying me to the laundry room every single time even when another adult is home. To have him grab my cell phone when I am in the middle of writing a semi-important email because he needs to see "pictures" or say hi to an imaginary person on the line.
It tires me out. It makes me a tad irrational and cranky and short tempered. And definitely not speaking in my calm, smoothing super mommy voice.
But it's okay. Raising kids is hard. And tiring. And never ending. And a blessing I complain about and take for granted way too often. So I accept myself where I am at in this cranky state and say my favorite line: "Tomorrow is a new day!"

The crew on the bus today....not sure the other passengers enjoyed our loud company

Flying solo

My husband likes to travel- a lot. He loves going to conferences and grabs at any opportunity to see a new venue. The complicating factor in that is that we have four kids so joining him isn't always a feasible option.
Which is how I find myself yet again home alone with the kids while my husband is off in Los Angeles, ostensibly to speak at a conference but really just to get away and get some sun :) 
I'm not particularly fond of L.A, mostly likely due to a fiasco three years ago that left him stranded there for 5 days while I went through an awful snow storm with the kids on my own.
Nevertheless, he is gone for 72 hours and I am gearing up for a Shabbos alone with the kids. Don't really have that much on the agenda other than keeping everyone safe and myself sane, especially on the very very long Shabbos afternoon. Wish me luck!

How we have been

Kind of hard to summarize a year and a half in a blog post. So much have happened. The kids have gotten so big.
They amaze me every day with the things they do and know and their incredible thoughts. They also frustrate the heck out of me because they are still loud, crazy, energetic and always seem to find new ways to test my patience.

Y is turning 9 in a few weeks. That is pretty crazy to me. He is doing amazing in so many ways. He has grown so tall and has really come into himself. He communicates very well and is all boy- he loves all sports, especially football and basketball. His new love is wrestling, which we are trying to put a stop to, since it never ends well.

A is 7.5 and is still the princess and ruler of the house. The boys look up to her and go along with her crazy schemes and games. She has become an avid reader, which I am going to have to claim as coming from my gene pool, since I spent most of my childhood lying on my bed reading. She loves American Girl books, Katie Kazoo, Ivy & Bean and anything else she can get her hands on. She loves gymnastics and is pretty amazing with the things she can do- cartwheels, handstands, you name it. Although she is a girly girl, she is also very bouncy with a constant need to move, which can drive me a little crazy. She is very mature and insightful, often understanding things without us having to explain it to her. She inherited my stubborn streak, which can make life "interesting" but mostly it's been fun watching her grow up and her personality develop.

M is 5 and us our absentminded professor. He is very smart and is always deep in thought about something. He is very good at math and has taught himself addition and subtraction. He is also teaching himself to read and is reading sight words and short books such as the Gerald and Piggy- series. He is very social and is Mr. Popular in his new pre-school. I usually get frustrated at him, when I am trying to go somewhere and he is still standing around without his pants on or got distracted somewhere between putting his first and second shoe on. Or when I am trying to talk to him and he is too involved in coloring/reading or building lego to even hear me...Mostly we have fun together, he has a lot of playmates between Y and AY although he seems to clash with A sometimes. He is also very sensitive and he often talks about his feelings being hurt. I try to validate his feelings without coddling him too much, a delicate balance.

And then there is AY. Not even sure where to begin. He is 2.5 and now a walking, talking firecracker.
All my kids are energetic but this one takes the cake. Always on the move, always touching/breaking/spilling something, he definitely keeps me on his toes. He has that mischievous twinkle in his eyes and says the funniest things. Right now, his obsessions are: Torah, spiderman and firetrucks. He talks about torahs non-stop which is quite hilarious. He also runs to the window every time he hears a siren. He is an awful sleeper and often ends up in my bed overnight and I let him because he is the fourth and I'm tired and I just want to sleep.
He has an infectiously positive personality and it's hard to stay angry at him, even when he does the craziest thing. He is also very friendly and is buddies with all the doormen and utility men in our building. His hair is getting longer and curlier each day and we still have six months to the haircut.

 

And there you have it, our crazy, motley crew!

4 years old!

I think blogging is like exercising. When you are in the routine, you do it regularly. Once you slip, it's hard to get back into it. I'll use that to explain my long absence from this blog. No real excuse other than life, family visits, finals and other fun things. Moving right along...
M turned 4 today! His English birthday is still two weeks away but we decided to celebrate the Hebrew date. He helped me make his birthday cake and we decorated it  with frosting, chocolate chips and sprinkles. We had cake and pizza (in that order) and he wore a cute little crown we made him.

birthday boy

ay enjoying the cake a bit too much

Our little man has really grown up this year. I have finally gotten used to his short hair cut, although I still miss his curls. He is getting used to wearing a kippa and tzitzit every day.
M loves coloring. He could sit there for hours and uses up reams and reams of paper. He has a great imagination and colors people, robots and other things. He can also write his name. Lucky for him it is short. He loves the color red and superheroes such as spiderman and superman. He also loves music and can often be found singing to himself.
Another thing he likes is books. We try to go to the library weekly for new books and he loves to sit and read together. He also likes puzzles and games such as memory, chutes and ladders or Go Fish. We are still a little wobbly on all the rules but he is learning.
M has a great personality- very easygoing and loving. He is friends with everyone in his class and his teachers tell us how everyone vies to play with him. We love the preschool he is in and he loves going there. He is disappointed when there is vacation and often asks when he can go back.
M says the funniest thing such as "If I watch too many videos I will be a potato couch" and he also asks very smart questions. Of course he is mischievous and always thinking of creative ways to wreak havoc, but that is all part of the fun of having a boy.

wearing my headscarf and heels

in the newspaper box

When he is tired, he can get a little whiny and tantrumy but so do most people. He is still a little jealous of Baby AY but I do try to give M attention when the others are not home. We go to the library together and we usually bake together- another activity he loves. We usually make muffins or cookies and M is a great helper..when he is not spilling flour all over the place or putting his cookie hand prints on the wall.
I can't wait to see how much more he will grow and learn this year!

being silly w the siblings

PS: For the few of you who like this stuff- a link to M's birthstory

A Tale of 2 Parties

I have to be honest. I love my routine and schedules. I find it is the only way to stay afloat these days. So after the kids get home from school around 4 we do homework and they watch a bit of video, at 5 we do dinner, and at 5 30 we do baths. At 6 we are in PJs reading books and playing "calm" games (the calm thing does not always happen but we try...) 6 45 we brush our teeth, fill the water bottles and at 7 pm we say good night, although recently the kids have been staying up till closer to 8. But they need to be in their room, ideally in their beds.
So this works pretty well. And then of course once a week it's Shabbos and that messes everything up again. But we work around it. And then every month or two there is a Jewish holiday that throws a wrench into my perfectly structured evenings.
Right now we are in the middle of Channukah which means a week of mayhem and late nights and way too much sugar. I try to be flexible, but ask my husband, it is really not my biggest strength. We also wanted the kids to have fun, though, so I knew I needed to get out of my comfort zone.

Monday night we decided to take the kids to Channukah on Ice, even though the event did not even start till 6 pm, which is usually PJ time. Basically, Chabad takes over the whole ice skating rink in Central Park and there is kosher food, Jewish music, candle lighting and a performance by the Maccabeats.
We knew this was an ambitious plan so we asked our awesome babysitter to come with us for back-up. Of course we caused a stir on the subway there because there were 4 kids and 3 adults and lots of noise. We were kind of hard to miss. We got there okay and proceeded to put the 3 big kids in ice skates. This was their first time, so they were tripping all over their feet before they even got on the ice. But I have to say it worked out really well. The weather was beautiful, the views of Central Park amazing. A went off with her friend and actually got the hang of skating. The babysitter and I each took one of the boys and took them on a few rounds. My husband held the baby, because the skates did not seem to fit his feet well. I loved being on the ice- I have fond memories of going ice skating every Sunday as a child and it was fun being back in skates. We skated a bit, had dinner and then stayed for the Maccabeats performance- M was dancing and Y was loving every minute too. Things were going so well, I was surprised when my husband said it was past 8 pm and time to leave...I was having fun and would have gladly stayed for more skating.
But the baby and M were getting really tired, so we called it a night. The kids were super excited and the event was a definite success, especially given the fact that I did not come home stressed and overwhelmed.

The next night, however, was a different story. We were scheduled to go to a chocolate making party at a local candy store. First, Y refused to go, so he stayed home with a sitter. When we got to the store, M was not interested in making chocolate and instead was walking around touching all the candy...Baby AY was excited about all the sugar and I had to hold him and make sure he did not get to it. Then Y changed his mind and showed up with his sitter, who was not doing a great job of supervising him. He also started wandering around the store, grabbing things. I now had 3 out of 4 kids not participating and wandering around a store full of candy and chocolate, and my stress level was getting higher and higher.
I was counting the minutes till the pizza dinner, hoping that would offer a good distraction, when all of a sudden, Y grabbed on to the jelly bean dispenser and yanked, sending a cascade of literally hundreds of jelly beans flying all over the store...I was really embarrassed and decided I had reached my threshold.
I grabbed 2 slices of pizza to go and shepherded the 3 boys out of the store and back home where they ate, took baths and got back into my regular routine, while we waited for A to come home with my husband.

The moral of the story- you never know which event will go smoothly and which will require a lot of supervision and nerves. It's not always the one you think it will be. We are all partied out at this point and will spend the next few nights at home playing dreidel and eating chocolate gelt. I am happy we were able to do some fun things with the kids. I do feel that we are creating positive memories for them when we make the extra effort to take them somewhere special. That is something that is important to me and that makes all the stress and  logistics involved in planning outings ALMOST worth it. But I am looking forward to getting back to my boring routine.
Happy Channukah to all!

Things I am thankful for

Although I am not really a fan of Thanksgiving, it is always nice to take stock and appreciate all the great things I have in my life. So in no particular order, some serious, some more in jest, here is my list of things I am thankful for this year:

-My little AY. Turning a year and bringing so much joy into our life. He is at an age where he is busy exploring and is keeping me on my toes, but it is fun to watch him discover things, play with his siblings, and to hear his infectious giggle. Of course I am thankful for my other children, who say the funniest things and always find new creative ways to give me minor heart attacks

- that my kids love spending time with my in-laws. We took a train out to their home today and they were so excited for our little trip. I love that think they view taking a subway and then a train as an adventure (I know, we don't get out much) and that they were looking forward to this little outing for so long, planning it and talking about it at school.  They even spent the morning making special cards to bring my in-laws as a present

- That my big guy is making progress.

I love this kid. Some days he frustrates me so much I want to scream (this is not really unique to special needs, the other kids have that amazing quality too) but the truth is he is really growing a lot. His speech is expanding every day and he amazes us with the things he tells us. We are ever so slowly seeing progress in the last few hurdles of toilet training. He is obsessed with football (and the iPad), loves his baby brother and playing with his cars. If he stopped waking me at 5 15 that would be awesome, but he truly is a great kid and I am thankful for him.

-My Ergo baby carrier that lets me have my hands free when I need them. We decided to leave the stroller home today on our trip, which was a good decision because the train was packed and it also saved time. Enter the ergo. When I need to run down to get the kids from the bus, I often use it too. In the afternoons when AY gets cranky and does not want to get put down and I have to make dinner/give baths. etc, I use the (you guessed it) Ergo.

Riding on my back

I do have a moby wrap and a sling that I use sometimes but this is really the easiest and most functional. Thank goodness for babycarriers.

-My husband. He is supporting me on my venture to obtain a nursing degree which means a lot to me. I know it is not easy for him that I am less available and busier, to have to pitch in more with childcare when my babysitters are not reliable (don't get me started...) and of course to pay for all of it :) But we are doing this thing together, slowly and steadily. It's nice to be a team- in this and all other areas.

-That my dad came to visit for the week bearing gifts- most importantly Belgian Kleinfeld chocolate. Now that is something to be really thankful for....

What are you thankful for?

Redefining busy

 When I was newly married and in school, trying to make dinner and master household chores while studying and taking tests I felt busy. When I had an infant with special needs and was balancing therapy sessions and household, I thought my hands were full (by the way, I hate that expression but that's for another post). When I had two kids 15 months apart and moved halfway across the world to become the Rabbi's wife, I had a lot going on. Just when things were getting into a routine, along came baby number , beginning the period of time called "3 kids under 4 in diapers" which was pretty intense 

Then little AY was born. Then I went back to school, taking just one course. This semester I am taking two courses with labs. In September, I hope to start nursing school full-time. Can you say "busy"? 

There are still only 24 hours in a day. I still attempt to get about 7 hours of sleep a night. Yet somehow it all (or most of it) gets done. This is not about bragging about how amazing I am...quite the opposite. This is about the realization about how much we can actually accomplish. Just when we think our days are full, something else gets added to our schedule or responsibilities and we manage to squeeze it in. Then we do it again.

Of course there is always a limit. Eventually something has to give. There needs to be downtime- to eat, relax, recharge, whatever. But it is still pretty cool how much we actually CAN do, even when we think we can't. So give yourself a pat on the back- we are all supermoms :)

On the topic of taking some time for  yourself, read this

To read more about what an amish birth center can tell us about lowering the C-section rate, check this out. 

And this is the final word on being busy and what moms really do all day:

some crazy/cute stuff going on

Where to begin?


This morning A. said she is going to vote for Romney because he is a friend of Israel and he will lower the price of taxis...we almost died laughing. And we do not talk politics with our kids so she picked this up at school.

AY discovered his shadow this afternoon. It was the cutest thing. he was kneeling by the wall and kept waving his hands and looking and trying to "catch" his shadow by moving or standing up. He was entertaining himself for a while this way and I was being entertained by watching him. It's amazing how kids discover the world. Sometimes I just want to eat him...

On Friday morning I discovered that someone had peed on the bathroom floor....far away from the toilet...intentionally. Said child was very lucky that they were not home when I discovered the sizable puddle. I will not reveal the identity of the offender, but will just say that it is not who you think it is. Seriously, what are my children thinking?

M. had a major tantrum/melt-down on Thursday. The cause of his distress was yogurt, specifically the fact that I would not let him eat straight out of a 32 oz. tub and requested that he eat from a bowl instead.  When he finished screaming and yelling, he fell asleep on the cold kitchen floor, which led me to believe that the cause of his tantrum was really severe exhaustion and not the yogurt. It looked something like this

Yesterday, when cleaning behind the radiator cover in our living room, which I had not done in a long time I discovered about 25 matchbox cars and 20 little wooden blocks that Y had deposited there. He was so excited to have them back and started playing with them right away. I warned him that if he hides them there again, he will not get them back, rather I will throw them out or give them away. 24 hours later, guess where most of the cars and blocks are again. Question is, am I going to follow through on my statement?

That's about all folks. Wishing us all a boring, calm week!

Waiting for Sandy

So, the internet is abuzz with news of Hurricane Sandy. We too are home, waiting to see how this unfolds.
I think the media hyping everything up and reporting every 15 minutes definitely adds to a sense of unnecessary panic. This storm is something to be taken seriously but hysteria never helped anyone.
I happen to be lucky and live in an area of NYC that is expected to be hit very minimally by the storm. I am grateful for that and very happy that I am not in Atlantic City or other parts of New Jersey.
The MTA shut down their transit last night and school is closed today and will remain closed tomorrow. There are concerns about losing power but there is no way to know if and when that will happen. We just feel like we are in limbo here, waiting and waiting for the storm to finally come so it can be over. It has been over 24 hours of waiting with no rain and some wind, but nothing to write home about.
The storm is supposed to hit tonight and then I guess we will see. For now we are just hanging around at home. The kids are mostly entertaining themselves. I had planned to be productive, cleaning up, organizing closets, etc but in the end I opted for the lazy option of reading, knitting and just hanging around. I think I may regret not having spent the day doing more "useful" days, but I am just viewing it as a "mental health day" where there are no obligations- other than keeping my kids entertained and well fed.
In other news, this little man just turned 11 months and is as delicious as always.

He is really a big boy, crawling all around the apartment, getting into stuff and playing with toys. He definitely likes to explore- the toilet and my kitchen cabinets are his favorite places.
He is pretty steady cruising around while holding on, sometimes just with one hand. He also loves the playground, going down slides and just being able to climb all over. When he is well fed and slept, he is delightful, always smiling and laughing and in a great mood. When he is tired or hungry, he gets cranky and clingy, but then, so do some adults I know.
AY is also a voracious eater- he has been having regular dinner with us these past few nights. One night it was pasta and meat sauce, another night chicken, couscous and carrots. He will eat it all. My friends tell me it is a blessing to have a baby who eats and I totally agree..even if it means I am now cooking dinner for 2 adults and 4 hungry kids :)

Also wanted to share my favorite new blog. She is so funny and spot on. It's called Five kids is a lot of kids- fyi, four is a lot of kids too :) Check it out, but just warning there is some talk about bodily functions...something that happens when you have a lot of kids.

Stay safe and dry!

I did it!

In the past few weeks I have deal with:
6 days of yomtov
3 shabbatot
1 major fast
4 large meals with company and countless others for the family
5 weeks of school
3 exams
1 lab report and 2 short assignments
mountains of laundry
children home from school due to non-stop holidays
a baby who still does not like to nap or sleep
a minor foot injury
1 birthday party for my husband
1 nursing school application
...and lived to tell the tale!

I feel accomplished, proud and very very tired. It seemed like every moment I had was allocated towards one project or another, whether it was cooking, studying for an exam or other family business that needed attending to. The last hurdle is this weekend, when we are having a guest speaker at our shul which means yet another big meal to cook/serve and clean up.
I kept telling my friend that I just had to get through till this past Wednesday- and I did.  I am hoping that things will lighten up once we start our regular schedule, where every other day is not a holiday or Shabbos. Although I am not so sure because as soon as yomtov was over, I scheduled about 5 doctor's appointments for the children and myself. But I am not going to worry about that just yet.
For now, I will just try to catch up on some sleep...

First Day of School

After a long and fun summer, the first day of school has finally arrived! Y started 2nd grade and A is a first
grader. I brought them to school the first morning to meet their teacher and help them feel more comfortable.
A's school had a special assembly for the first graders, where they got name tags and got to meet their teachers.
They then said good bye and went upstairs to be divided into classes. A was happy to be with many of her friends from last year.
Here she is in her new uniform

Y was a little hesitant about going to school, even though we had prepared him for it for a few weeks already. Once he saw his teachers and friends, though, he was much more at ease.
I also met the newest member of his class- the cutest little boy who just happens to have Down Syndrome. He is only 5 and so little, I can't even remember when Y was so little.
M went to school for a grand total of 15 minutes to meet his teachers. He starts on Tuesday, although they are still doing phase-in so he will be going for only an hour.
I start school on Wednesday- I am a little nervous because I will be in school more hours this semester, but hopefully it will all work out.
This morning was the first morning of school buses. We got up extra early because I was not sure when exactly the buses were coming. In the end, Y's bus came at 7 30 and A's bus came at 7 40.
It is going to be hard to coordinate because Y's bus stops in front of our building and A's bus stops across the street. But hopefully once the buses are more regular, we will figure out where to go first.
Y's bus driver is really nice. she gave me her cell phone number and told me that she will keep me posted with updates.
Looking forward to getting more into a schedule...although Rosh Hashana will be interrupting it again :)

Last Summer Outing

Today was the last day to do something fun as a family, so we decided to check out Victorian Gardens in Central Park. We had gone there a long time ago, when Y was about 4 years old and A was three and it had not been a success. It was very loud and Y freaked out and refused to even enter the park. They were also too young to enjoy most the rides.
Fast forward a few years and we are giving it another shot. We still were not sure how everyone would do with the loud noise and fast rides but this time it was a total success! We bought the unlimited ride option for the kids, which was a good thing because they went on every single ride- all the fast, up and down, swings, cars, roller coasters. My husband and I were saying how we would never get on these rides ourselves, but the kids all had a great time. AY mostly just watched from his stroller and napped a bit.
We came home tired but very happy. We would definitely go there again although the cost was a bit steep- but we have come to expect that, as Manttan just won the designation as the most expensive place to live in the US.
Here are some of the rides we went on

the fast swings- Y was screaming but came off saying "more"

the tame train

swing- also pretty tame

jumping frogs

the "scariest" ride- M was not allowed on it and was pretty upset about it . we were relieved :)

Let's not forget that today is "labor" say, so I am also sharing something related to birth- check out this great quote from Ina May Gaskin

Happy Labor Day to all!

Our Busy Day

Today was a good day, one in which I got a lot done. I feel accomplished.
Our busy day started with a ride crosstown to First Avenue to drop Y off at his Friendship Circle camp. Anyone who lives in this part of town will tell you that going to First Avenue, is like going to Siberia....Y has been going all week. Aside from the logistics of getting him there and back, he has been having fun although I think he worries that he is missing out on the fun things we are doing at home. He is not altogether wrong as I am trying to spend some quality time with M and A. while he is out.
After he was dropped off, we took another cab downtown to my college to change a class for my upcoming semester. I had attempted to do it over the phone but they insisted that I need to come in. So I brought my crew and thankfully, it only took 10 minutes, in which M and A kept themselves busy watching videos on the iPad.
The next step of our journey was to Brooklyn- A. really wanted to go to a playspace there and I had promised her we would go at some point over vacation.
The train was right next to my college, so we hopped on and arrived at Kids N Action about 45 minutes later. The kids had a blast- AY had fun too. He slept on the ride there so he was in a great mood when we arrived. We stayed about 2.5 hours and then took 3 subways home. The kids were good sports about it and it only took a little over an hour.
Once we got home, I started cooking for shabbos. And then after putting the kids to bed, I also cleaned the apartment because my cleaning lady/housekeeper of six years has decided to disappear on me and stop answering my phone calls.
Now I am relaxing a bit even though I should be studying for the GRE which I am taking less than two weeks from now.
At this point I am pretty much counting down the days till school starts. We are ready- we have our clothing, our shoes, haircuts, backpacks, school supplies, etc. Now all we need to do is actually drop them off....still have another week to go!

Back to School

And once again it's late Frriday.
It has been a busy week of getting everything into order, mailing in health forms, and other administrative stuff. We were also busy getting ready for school (only 2 weeks left, but who is counting?) otherwise known as "credit card please".
Getting four kids outfitted and ready for school/fall is not cheap- there is clothing, socks, shoes, school supplies, hair cuts, backpacks...even with passing clothing down from kid to kid it still adds up. But thank G'd for these kind of problems- 3 healthy kids eager to go back to school and one yummy baby who will be mostly  hanging out with me.
Good Shabbos to all

Israeli Kids Stay Up Late

One thing that I noticed when we were in Israel was that all the kids were out late. I know it was vacation so no one had to get up for school but people bring their children everywhere- to restaurants, to the kotel late at night and even to wine tastings.
It does not really bother me personally what other people do with their kids with although I did witness quite a few meltdowns from little two year olds who were crying that they could not walk/stand anymore at 11 pm at night. It must just be a cultural thing, possibly weather related- it is definitely cooler at night in Jerusalem, or maybe they just really cannot afford a babysitter.
I, however, am not going to be catching on to this trend anytime soon. Here is why. I have a limited amount of energy and patience. My kids are early risers, they seem to wake up with the sun, some days even before the sun comes up. After getting up early and spending most of the day with them (remember, summer vacation- all day every day), I am usually reaching my limit by around 7 pm.
So we read books, brush our tooth and call it a night. Most of the time, they are also exhausted by the activities of the day so they fall asleep pretty quickly. Even AY seems to finally be on a schedule (yay!) and goes to bed around 7.
And then, when they are all sleeping, it is QUIET. At which point I can relax- blog, read and sometimes even go out on a date with my husband. We found a wonderful babysitter in Israel and took advantage, going out about twice a week. I could not imagine dragging my kids along. It would not be fun- for them or me. They need their sleep. When they do not sleep enough they are cranky and even crazier than usual. And if you think because they go to sleep late they will wake up late in the morning, you are mistaken. Less sleep and more time chasing after them, would make for one cranky Mommy.
Additionally, I cannot imagine my children actually behaving themselves- eating nicely in a restaurant, sitting quietly at the kotel, watching us sample wines at the Wine festival. Our children are always in movement and therefor always need someone supervising them.
So while I do love all things Israel, taking kids out late at night is not a trend I will be following anytime soon. Instead, I will continue to savor the quiet and take advantage of the time off to sit and enjoy myself, without anyone tugging at me.

The 100$ mosquito bite

Sometimes as a veteran mom, I think I already know all there is to know. People often tell me that I am a calm, relaxed mom, and most of the time I think that is true. I do not usually get freaked out by a runny nose or a nasty fall.
But recently my Mommy intuition has failed me. About two months ago, a few hours before shabbos, M. was acting weird and lying in bed. When I asked him if he was feeling sick, he burst out crying. Having recently gone through a shabbos with a screaming child who had strep and needed antibiotics, I wanted to take care of it right away. So I ran out to a walk-in medical clinic. We had to wait a bit and while we were waiting, it became clear to me that M. was not sick, rather wanted to be special and have antibiotics. So I came home an hour before Shabbos with a perfectly healthy child feeling kind of stupid.
Fast forward to our trip in Israel and little AY is covered in what looks like a rash or possibly bites. They are different sizes and some of them are red and swollen. For a few days I dismiss them as mosquito bites, especially because he does not seem particularly bothered by them. Today for some reason, though, I decided that there are so many of them, I want someone to take a look at them. So I walk down to the nearby clinic and ask how much it would cost to be seen. They tell me 500 shekel (about 120$), so I swallow and say okay. I send the older kids to lunch with my husband and spend about a half hour waiting. Apparently there are others with Erev Shabbos emergencies. When we finally get to see the doctor, he is English speaking and very nice. He confirms that indeed, AY has a bad case of mosquito bites. He is nice enough to validate my concerns and say that I was right to check it out. He recommends calamine lotion and sent us on our way.
I guess you win some, you lose some. There was also a time I took Y to the doctor on a whim, even though he did not seem that sick, and he did have strep. I would rather be safe than sorry, but I also don't want to be running to the doctor every 5 minutes. It's a balance I guess.I am sure over time I will learn to be more discerning- and to identify mosquito bites on a baby.
Wishing everyone a beautiful Shabbos

Trip down Memory Lane

Now that we have gotten through Tisha B-Av and jet lag, we are having a lot of fun here. Unfortunately we do not have a camera to document any of it. Our digital camera is as old as Y (7) and has finally died. We usually use our phones but they do not work in this country. It's a shame, but the truth is memories are being made, even if I do not have the pictures to prove it.
We spent some more time with cousins who were (ironically enough) going to NY for vacation. Today we found a great play space for the kids, that is not overcrowded with the "bein hamzanim" throngs. It was not cheap but the kids played for at least two hours and would have stayed longer had we not decided it was time to get going.
This place was near Har Nof (I won't say where, this place is staying our seceret), our old neighborhood, so we decided to swing by and show the kids our old apartment and visit the neighbors. It was kind of surreal. In certain ways, things had changed- the lobby of our old apartment building looked different, some stores had closed while others had opened, etc. In other ways, it was like we never left. We visited our neighbors, who lived right next door. They were so happy to see us and meet our younger kids. They are so sweet. I took the kids into our old apartment and was expecting to feel a lot of nostalgia, but really it felt foreign. Kind of familiar but with other people's stuff and furniture in it, it did not feel like ours at all. The kids really do not remember it, as Y was about 16 months  old when we moved and A was pretty much a newborn.
It really felt like a different life time. There was also a big gaping hole, where a mountain used to be. In an effort to use any build-able space, someone seems to be building apartment buildings into the mountain between Shaulzon and Agassi. Where the 200 steps used to be, there is just a hole and lots of debris. It's pretty crazy to think that if we come back two years from now, there will be new apartment buildings in that space.
But I am learning that life goes on without you...just because we have not been to Har Nof in four years does not meant that things are not constantly evolving. When we visited last summer, my sister's daughter was a little baby, This year she is a real toddler.
At the risk of sounding like an old lady, I will try to enjoy my time here while it lasts. Before we know it, we will be back on a plane and getting ready for a new school year.

Also apropos nothing, here is a great article about disabilities, "having it all" and having enough- Enjoy.

We have arrived

Because we are crazy like that, we have had a busy week. First, we were severely delayed on the way home from Florida... due to rainstorms in NYC we got home with 4 cranky and exhausted kids after midnight. After very little sleep, Thursday and Friday had me disassembling and then reassembling the contents of all my kitchen cabinets so an exterminator could aggressively treat out kitchen (and the rest of the apartment). Due to construction in the building, we had been dealing with some unwelcome visitors and the situation was getting out of hand. I am hoping this finally took care of the issue.
Friday was also spent packing, running last minute errands and trying to get the apartment cleaned up before our Sunday flight (more on that later).
Shabbos was my birthday- ta da. I was a bit too tired to get really excited for it, but it ended up being a nice day. My kind husband gave me the gift of sleep and did some extra diaper duty and the kids had made me nice cards. Still on my wishlist for my birthday:
-sleep (will probably not be getting much of that
- massage- will definitely be doing that. My back is still giving me problems.
- some more alone/quiet/mommy time, whatever you like to call it ;)
Notice how all these gifts involve some sort of self-care/indulgence. Every once in a while a care-taker has to take care of herself/

Sunday was the big day- our long awaited flight to Israel for our yearly trip. Honestly, I was a bit too stressed/anxious about getting ready to be really excited for this trip. But now that we are here...it's so nice.
The flight was about as good as you can expect when traveling with 4 little kids. No delays or waits, a bassinette and an extra seat and mostly cooperative kids with no major tantrums/meltdowns. The stewardesses and passengers around us all fell in love with Baby AY and commented on how cute and smiley he is. He is all of those things but after 6 plys hours of holding him almost non stop, I was quite ready for his royal cuteness to sleep a bit!!
We are all kind of exhausted and jet lagged but psyched to be here to see family and friends...after we get some more sleep!!

Welcome to Camp Mama

Summer vacation is 3 months long here in nyc. That is a lot of time to entertain the kiddos.
For the past month, we have been keeping busy with camp mom. It basically consisted of outings to local parks, children's museums and the like. It was working pretty well except for complaints from my 5 year old teenage daughter that everything is "boring".
This week we have moved to phase 2 of our vacation. We flew down to Florida on Wednesday to spend a week with my in-laws. The kids are veteran travelers and were pretty well behaved. The whole thing went smoothly. We left home at 7 45 and arrived at their house by 1 30. Good practice for,our upcoming trip to Israel.
Life is much more slow paced down here. It's nice to just hang out with nowhere to go and nothing pressing to do.
The plan for the week is to spend lots of time in the water and relaxing. We do an activity with the kids in the morning (zoo, park, etc) and in the late afternoon, when most people have left, we go to the pool. I bought them bathing suits with floaties inside. They look a bit silly but they work
My mother in law did a great job researching all the kid friendly activities in the vicinity. We joke  around that this week the kids are in Camp Mama (what my kids call my mother in law).

Here are some pictures from camp mama. Good shabbos to all!

Week in Review

It has been a busy week in our household. Some highlights:
- I took 2 exams and a final and am now officially DONE until September. Yay. I actually really liked the class- Anatomy and Physiology. It is really cool to learn how the body works. Some of it connected to my work as a doula (i.e bones of the pelvis) and some if it to my yoga practice. My teacher always talks about the different muscles we are strengthening and now I actually know what she is talking about. And it was also good to see that my kids managed without me with a competent babysitter.

- Y's birthday- 7 years old. Crazy, crazy that he is so big. We had a party at school for him on Tuesday and another small celebration at home on Thursday. He was very excited. When asked what he wants for his birthday, he said "cars" even though we have a ton of matchbox cars already. If that is what makes him happy though, we will get a few more. In some ways he has grown so much this year, in other areas we are still struggling. But that is not necessarily unique to special needs. Every child has their own strengths and weaknesses.

Y at his party, looking a bit overwhelmed...

-Speaking of seven, Baby AY turned 7 months this week. Not quite as momentous an occasion as 7 years old yet still exciting. He is sitting very well, although still cannot get into sitting position by himself. He crawls around the apartment looking for me and saying 'mamamama". Not sure if he means me, but it's cute nonetheless.

sitting up nicely

enjoying the swings with Papa

- Camp Mom is in full swing as everyone is now officially done with school. Y's last day was Wednesday. We have been exploring different playgrounds but have been a bit limited by the fact that I had to leave to school by 2. This week we will have more time and perhaps attempt a more extensive adventure. When we are home, the kids have surprised me by playing together really nicely and imaginatively. Of course that involves taking out every toy we own, but it is still nice to see that they can play by themselves.

kids doing crazy gymnastics at home

A. and I had a little date at the Museum of Natural History. Check out those elephants

EDITED- added  pictures so you can see the kids' antics.

What summer adventures have you been up to?